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A CRACKED KETTLE

• by Kelvin Mason

Hitching her skirt and petticoats, Mary-Beth stepped over the body of the very last guest, her would-have-been father-in-law. This-all should bring a whole new meaning to the term shotgun wedding. Pumping to eject a spent cartridge, Mary-Beth nodded in satisfaction, smiling a vermilion lipstick gash. She blew a kiss at the smear that had been Bobby, her intended. Damn straight, not a whole lot of third-grade English teachers got to make a contribution like this to the language.`

© Kelvin Mason, 2000
kelvin.mason@mail.dk‘

' Language is a cracked kettle on which we beat out tunes for bears to dance to, while all the time we long to move the stars to pity.’ (Gustave Flaubert)

contact: kelvin.mason@mail.dk

*You can now buy direct from the horse copies of my novels
The Advent of the Incredulous Stigmata Man and Cold Snap, complete with new covers and review quotes:
'Just crying out to be seen on the big screen.' (The List, Stigmata Man)
'Frightening, invigorating and totally addictive.' (What's On, Cold Snap)
The price is £6 (six GBP) plus post and packing - so probably about £7 all in all within Europe. With a cover price of £7.99, I hope you'll agree they're little bargains: tell your friends. (And no, I don't find this self-promotion easy or comfortable, but with a bankrupt publisher I have no other choice)


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