International Writers Magazine: Lifestory
Search of the Rainbow
Davis was once asked to describe herself in five words. In reply
she said "I am just too much". In a sense this is how
I am feeling right now. Who am I? What am I like? How can you
explain yourself with so little words especially when you yourself
have no idea who you are?
I come from Leicester
and because of this I have a love of culture as it is painted with every
different colour and religion you can imagine. The richness of diversity
has made me develop an affection with everything that is not English.
At home I do not have an English friend and as a consequence do not
feel English myself.
My friends are everything to me. Moutio, Steve and Tina are the people
who I breathe for. There is a Greek saying: "friends should be
lovers" and, in a sense, this is true of my friends. In that I
love them so deeply and so strongly that I could and would do anything
for them. They are far greater than any lover that I have ever had but
maybe that is because my relationships are like minefields waiting to
explode. I am a very loyal person and nothing will sever my ties. Some
things cannot be broken, and my friendships are one of them.
Another thing which cannot be broken is my love of Bette Davis and old
movies. Miss Davis has been my idol for four years ever since I saw
"All About Eve" and read many books about her. I feel that
she knows me more than anyone else and the quotes that I have read or
heard her say really feel as if she is talking to me.
I also place a great emphasis on the importance of quotations in that
I feel knowledge can be gained from them and knowledge is the most important
thing on Earth, as long as you put it in to practice for good but then
I believe this because I am an Aquarius and this sign represents us
soaking up knowledge and then pouring it out onto others. Moutio, when
I asked him to describe me quoted: "I say what I mean, I mean what
I say but thats not what I meant" and that is me in a nutshell.
I am so contradictory but I hate lying and am always blunt but I also
change my mind constantly and this is why I am finding this so hard.
I dont know who I am because I change all the time.
I am a dying breed, a hippie. I always feel like I was born in the wrong
era but it is my mission to save the world, or at least a part of the
To sum me up I am going to finish with a quote I once read in "Mizz"
many, many moons ago but it has become my life quote and it is what
describes me more than anything:
"If you want a rainbow youve got to put up with the rain."
© Jayne Pearson Nov 2006
Jayne is studying Creative Writing at the University of Portsmouth
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