The International Writers Magazine: James
Campion's Reality Check
& GAY MARRIAGE
|March 12th 2004:
California's Supreme Court has ordered San Franciso Officials to
immediately suspend same-sex marriages. Over 3000 ceremonies for
gay couples have taken place since the city began issuing licences
in February and all of them are now in jeapody.
are we arguing about gay marriage, again? Please, I really would like
to know. Adult gay couples, citizens of these United States, cant
marry? Why? I cannot get around this. Honestly. This isnt a literary
vehicle to confound with circular logic or to flippantly speak to the
absurdities of the argument. I am not playing around. I really have
no fucking idea what the problem with this is.
Is it moral? What is moral? Isnt that self-realizing, not publicly
debated, much less voted on?
Who decides this? Law?
Law decides love? Law decides the heart?
This is about money, not morals. This is about entitlements, not law.
So heterosexuals are only permitted access to entitlements? On what
grounds? Didnt we just spend tons of cash and spill innocent blood
excising Saddam Hussein halfway across the globe for that kind of criminal
This isnt about morals. This isnt even about the sanctity
of love, whatever that is. Its about money. We want ours, to hell
with the rest. I know all about that. Typical.
Which is why these frightened dolts we vote for will never touch this
thing head-on, not even the embattled president, who started all of
this to polarize his right wing contingent once his numbers started
to plummet below the acceptable level. Its a ruse. Hes a
ruse. Always has been, and so is his apparent opponent who will not
answer this beyond civil unions or state rights, because John Kerry
is a scared little frontrunner, who has the convictions of a smack dealer,
and is sadly still a better choice than that insane idiot in charge
By merely suggesting this madness as a constitutional amendment is a
blatant form of bigotry. The chief executive has overreached his job
description and displays the worst kind of government oppression that
should not be tolerated by any American. We had to listen to this dolt
jabber on about freedom so we can dive head long into his holy war in
the name of freedom and then he pulls this hypocritical recrimination.
So, is the argument religious? On what authority? The Bible? The Bible
would have the Israelites, of which, in every description of purity,
we are few, marrying within the family. It is Gods will that we
keep the culture pure. Not your culture, the Israelites. So, if you
happen to be an Israelite, marry your kin. If not, which is likely,
shut the fuck up about religion and God. We know less about God than
anyone with the exception of Mel Gibson and Jerry Falwell, who know
less than nothing.
Is it the sanctity of marriage? What the hell is that? The sanctity
of marriage? Who decides that? Where is the outrage when Darva Congers
marries a millionaire in a televised contest? They can get legally hitched
for ratings, but homosexuals cant marry for love and financial
Was that Britney Spears fifteen-minute marriage more legal than Rosie
ODonnells? Apparently. But was it more moral or religious?
But dont get me started on that fat fraud, Rosie ODonnell.
When it suited her to be heterosexual to sell her talk show persona,
she was swooning all over Tom Cruise, and now that shes rich,
she is a militant dyke bitch from hell? What a phony. I think her stance
on gay rights goes right up there with O.J. Simpson being a martyr for
civil rights. Yeah, O.J. is black, and Ill be starting at center
for the Knicks tonight.
And by the way, I dont want Julia Roberts to get married anymore.
She made a mockery of marriage and embarrassed one of my favorite songwriters.
Im partial to Lyle Lovett. So, Ive decided she cannot get
married anymore. Period. That is my logic. I dont like Julia Roberts
marital record and I am a fan of Lyle Lovetts music. Stupid, right?
But that argument has some merit. I have solid evidence Roberts blows
at marriage. What merit does "gays cannot marry" have?
Moral? Nah. Religious? Nah. Aesthetic? Nah.
How is it legal to deny rights? In the name of opening a can of worms:
First you allow gays to marry, then fathers will be marrying sons and
people will marry pigs or lampposts. Sure, thats a good one. You
mean like we didnt need to abolish slavery and make African-Americans
citizens or allow women basic civil rights? Is it a bit like that kind
of can of worms? You know how many people had to be jailed and threatened
and publicly abused just to allow women to vote? And you know what those
arguments against womens right to vote were? Whats next,
five year olds voting? Dogs? Sofas?
Then of course there is the always popular: Its disgusting. Its
unnatural. Its disturbing. Im frightened of it. Yes, good.
Im disturbed by Salsa music, fast food, talk radio, the price
of a subway ride, and the L.A Lakers. Where can I sign up for banning
This is by far the dumbest subject Ive had to rebuke in this space,
and if youve been around for any of the past seven-plus years,
youd have to concur that Ive had some beauts. But this takes
the cake. It is so off the charts silly, it bares notice. There is no
possible argument for this, least of all legal. It is patently unconstitutional
and is all the reason George W. Bush would need to even broach it, because
if this makes it to the Supreme Court, its not even an issue,
nor should it be.
This is one of the times when you are embarrassed to be an American
and even more for being human.
© James Campion March 12th 2004
Gibson's 'Passion' here plus
all rights reserved