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The International Writers Magazine: Pick-Up Artists

From London with Love
Hayley Quinn
We’re a community of nymphomaniac nomads that travel the world teaching the art of seduction.

pick up

Pick-up Artistry is a global phenomenon, where trained ‘seduction artists’ spread their secrets on the ways to romance other people. PUA’s also tend to have a wanderlust. Our ‘one finger to the wind’ careers mean we’re rarely settled in one place: instead choosing regularly  to take our skills on the road from poolside in Rio, to the lobby of the Hilton Moscow.

However, we have bases in our city of choice which we call ‘lairs’(and yes, I’m certain the vampire/lion/thief analogy is intentional): Miami, LA, New York, Sydney, are all hot spots. But’s original lair is an apartment in London’s Piccadilly Circus. Here clients will travel from Aberystwyth to Afghanistan to take in a smorgasbord of London’s best seduction spots.

After spending years combing the streets of London to find its hippest hole in the walls, best bookshops, and coolest clubs, here are my must see sights for any seduction journey to London town:

Best Bar: If you like well heeled, Louboutin loving, ladies drinking Kir Royals then you need to get a Tom Collins at a west London hotel bar. The hip, upmarket hotels that flank either side of Oxford street are known for their decadent interiors, endorsement by escorts and insane drink prices (averaging £15 a pop). Their exclusivity makes them incredibly desirable though: and they do magnetise an affluent clientele. So if you want to pick up a girl whose handbag is likely to have cost more than your house; you need to perch yourself at the Sanderson or W hotel bars, order up a water on the rocks and make eyes at the high end hotties.

Hippest Hole-in-the-Wall: If the entire preceding paragraph made you puke; then chances are you’ll prefer Mayfair’s hipper, younger, cheaper and more ‘indie’ sister Shoreditch. A little rougher around the edges, East of the city has become the ‘cool’ place for artists and bankers alike to make their home. It may not be pretty but it’s edgy. Where else could you see a street art installation or a reasonably priced watering hole playing Italo-Disco sat next to a wealth of Asian eateries. Try Cay Tre for fantastic summer rolls and indochine beef salad: and wow your date with an authentic feast that won’t break the bank.  

Coolest Coffee Shop: London isn’t quite like New York where people will hang out in coffee shops all day (despite our apartments being equally expensive and decrepit).  But, if you want to blog on your London travels with an iced latte, or know the perfect spot for a cheap rendezvous then try some of London’s independent coffee shops. Milk Bar Soho does excellent French toast, or if you want a room with a view then the Tate’s top floor bar has panoramic views of the Thames... and a few cute art students milling around to boot.
Naughtiest Nightclub: Undoubtedly The Box, but if you can get in, call me because I can’t (yet). Other gems include Mahiki, Cirque and Maddox. London’s Mayfair nightlife is however, a muddle of high rollers, hair extensions and a confusing guest list system. Gone are the simple days where you could just walk up to a club and expect to pay £20 to get in. Unless you’re on the mystical list there’s no chance of you being let in to meet the hotties inside. So scrap the spontaneity and contact a club promoter like Vesper Black or Metparties to see if you’re ‘in’ enough to get in to London’s hottest night spots.

Sexiest Street: If you would rather be sprinting down the street after a gorgeous girl than cooped up in a nightclub then head to ‘target rich’ areas ie. Places with lots of gorgeous girls wandering around. Particularly prolific in beautiful babes, (though still miles behind LA, Miami, Rio, and other sexier cities) is Covent Garden on account of its shops and dance studios, and the King’s Road which is a Mecca for modelling agencies.
So next time you book a trip to London think about who really holds the keys to the city: it isn’t the investment bankers, politicians or media, it’s the pick-up artists who really know footstep for footstep where the best places to meet women, have fun and explore London are.
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© Hayley Quinn July 2011

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