Oh to be
Towe - Vancouver's Ex-Party Girl
Im a responsible flirt
If I were to be a stranger
and met myself, what kind of personality adjectives would I think of upon
spending 15 minutes with me then?I agree the words a little wild
would probably come to mind during the brief encounter, but what about
the substantials, like sweet, mature, even spiritual!? Although if I were
an open minded stranger I guess I could see all of that behind my facade.
think its hilarious that I am quoted "
Hey have you met Tabytha, she can party.
What is that? What does being able to party make of me? I can drink
a lot or do a lot of drugs or have a lot of orgies!
With this label am I pictured as wild, promiscuous, leather panted,
tight shirted, hates the government, abides by no authority, looks
like 35 at 19 years old? What?
In my (not so much of) defense, sure I like to party, maybe more often
than is healthy for you, I can see the damage, I know, trust me; but I
am not just that ...please refer to the quote above.
Can I not be known for something else other than my talent for being able
to live off 2 hours sleep between work and school within 3 days all the
while staying up drinking or dancing or off roading in the middle night
or God knows doing what kind of crazy shit? (Of course I am exagerating
when I say 2 hours sleep, really I need about 6 to last me 3 days!)
My own boyfriend who knows me better than anyone, next to my mom, gave
me his perspective the other day. I asked him approximately what his first
impression was of me, to tell me three things that came to mind when we
met about a year ago.
His disappointing response but not much to my surprise was: #1 Flirtatious
#2 Flirtatious #3 Flir
(He saw the look on my face and quickly changed
his last remark to
Alright, I admit I do like to flirt. Who doesnt though? honestly.
Its fun and it can be harmless *if you play by the simple rules.
Im a responsible flirt, with such grounds as knowing your limits,
not showing your boobs or your ass, and making sure that whomever you
are engaging with in this game that it is played fair, that both partners
understand it is just for fun and no more. I repeat, simple rules.
Besides flirtation kind of coincides with the party-girl-esque, dont
you think. On the other hand I think Id better shut up before someone
interprets me as a slut now for flirting.
To prove that I am capable of other such activities, by that I mean aside
from what you perceive of me already- boozehound, lesbian, I dont
know what ever goes- I will go through this entire entry without mentioning
once what I did the night before. (However in this past month I do have
some really great, wacky stories for you. Oh my goodness so funny - but
I shall not tell you one, no, no, no!) Hey, here is something cool I can
do. I can multi task! Seriously, I am typing while eating my lunch and
amusing my hyper active dog all at once. Ok so maybe that isnt so
recogniseable as a skill, but it is an acquired one, isnt it?
The reason why I am so concerned all of a sudden is that it has been brought
to my attention that I put a lot of energy in to having fun rather than
devoting all of it to school or other priorities. Like I said before,
I believe everything must be balanced. I try to juggle having a social
life without work taking up most of my time, with school and homework,
family events and/or affairs, a romantic/sex life with my boyfriend
I mean, its really fucking hard to balance it all. Accordingly I
try to divide my time between everyone and everything as much as seems
practical at the time, for it all depends on time. Some might complain
I am not being as fair to them, although its not fair to me either.
Im in my car for at least an hour a day, doesnt sound like
much but I could be doing something else with that hour driving takes
me. I am lucky if I get to visit my friends down town once a month, where
most of them live. I even have troubles spending time at home for crying
out loud! Just wish I had more time
dont we all. It would
save us so much and give us even more if we just had at least 30 hour
Anyhow, life is short and thats the gist of it, all that matters
is what you do with that short amount you get.
Im confused as to which is more important to me now though. Should
I allow more time studying or hanging out with my pals or spending my
hours with my family?
I think a nice get away from everyone would actually do me some good in
this matter, for when I return I can decipher where to put my energy,
with whom or what I might have missed more.
Ah but these days I do have more time to have that coffee with a girl
friend here or watch that soccer game there, see that movie there, go
for that drink here and there.
The trick is getting fired from one of your jobs!
Youve all heard me bitch about "The Boathouse" a million
times before, but now that I am actually out, I can bitch about it without
being careful. As much as I would love to tell you that I gave them the
finger it is in fact the other way around so Im not going to tell
you why I got canned because its really quite an unworthy explanation.
I had been with the job for two years too many. Doesnt seem long
but when youre not even a quarter of the way up the hill yet it
tends to have significance on becoming a big part of your life. I almost
feel scarred. I grew up from stupid teenager to a few months shy of a
still stupid- woman there. I always remember transitional periods and
therefore hold some sentiment.
The restaurant industry has taught me more than I would imagine was necessary
over the seasons there, and I have met many people through it. Although
there is much more to learn. The social aspects of working in a company
like "The Boathouse" is never ending, but it doesnt mean
that because I wont be working there anymore that it will end here.
Its time I moved on and beyond. I should have done that a while
ago, it would have benefited myself greater to have done so a year ago.
The only thing that kept me at such an unchallenging position for so long
(and so little pay I might add) is because of the friends I made. When
you get comfortable in a certain environment you dont necessarily
want to let it go. Its only now tafter I have left I realise that
I can still see friends outside of work or that perhaps well decide
not to make the effort or maybe well forget about one another.
Work related relationships are good while you are in the environment because
face it, you have to get along in a professional atmosphere and you are
stuck with each other day in day out for hours at a time. I have a lot
of people I know and can party with there, but not really who I can cry
to about my secrets. You either go for quantity or quality right
Ill miss them all very much and I still love them.
Before I go off galavanting and coffeeing here and there, I suppose the
wisest idea would be to get another job first. At least I still get 3-4
shifts at the present one, but after having two I cannot go back to one
pay cheque, I barely made it with two jobs before how will I ever suffive?
I still have to get my Christmas shopping started, yikes!?
© Tabytha Towe - Vancouver's ex-party girl
Towe - It's the endless celebration
when to stop - it's that Vancouver Party Girl
pockets on a summer day
Towe is broke - send cash now
Its already gotten down to looking for change in the couch for gas
money, my am I a lame scavenger.
am the kind of person who would lose my life savings on a stupid bet or
something, or I would find the best outfit in the world that makes me
look voluptuous and sexy, but in the wrong color.
moments from Tabytha Towe's diary:
SEVEN and a half-EIGHT-